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Friday, November 10, 2006
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+ don't judge me. 11:28 PM + + don't judge me. 11:59 AM + + don't judge me. 10:33 PM + + don't judge me. 10:42 PM + + don't judge me. 11:30 PM + + don't judge me. 7:55 PM + + don't judge me. 11:56 PM + + don't judge me. 11:16 AM + + don't judge me. 10:40 PM +
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Thursday, November 09, 2006
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Woke up late..
Didnt study..
Met Rachel at city hall mrt..
Then took paper..
Lucky i didnt study but i managed to do...
Rushed off to werk..
Reached werk at 1.20pm..
Started to do work immediately..
Rained when i was about to finish werk..
Its a miracle... he smsed me all a sudden..
Tout it was sometin swit or wat..
But infact he was like ordering me to do tings...
Gawd..
Wen am i gonna give up on him????...
Finished werk at 5.40pm..
Went to smoke at da mrt wit ma colleague and then took train to Tampines..
Meeting Tania and Jessie..
I was lyk a bloody fool waiting for these 2 piglets..
Thank god while waiting fo em, someone was accompanying me on da phone..
In da end..
Its only Jessie..
Went to eat Long John..
This Jessie keep staring at ma cleavage..
She horny already..
Tania dont want to meet me...
So sad..
Dont love me animore already..
Sobs..
Wats happening God??!!!!!
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Wednesday, November 08, 2006
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But ma womb gave me problems..
Couldnt even stand up..
So weak..
Went to da doctor and get both medicine and mc..
And i didnt go out da whole day..
Spend da whole day talking on da phone wit someone...
Lyfs such a bitch..
Its raining and damn boring..
Couldnt find Tania at all..
So down..
None of my bezfrens r around...
Jessie at ****'s house..
Damn...
Im so lonely...
Tania wer r u?
Dun wan me animore?
:(
Sobs...
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Monday, November 06, 2006
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Paper 2..
Damn..
Firstly i didnt manage to finish all da questions..
Secondly i lost all ma memory..
I didnt noe how to do so many questions..
Suddenly i was lyk so damn stupid..
I actually had confidence tat it was gonna be easy cz so far..
Ma maths was rather good..
But then halfway thru doing da paper,
Sumting crossed ma mind and suddenly i lyk turn to be stupid..
God..
After paper went down to smoke..
Then left for lunch..
Ate at coffee express with Jessie..
We talked a lot and i realised...
That i am capable of givin ppl advices but da problem is..
I dont heed da advices tat i give..
Coz ma heart's so weak and im already fallen deep.
I do wonder y he reacted dis way..
I expected him to act maturedly..
Y muz he act dis way?..
I do miss him a lot..
Tried ways and means fo things to go back lyk it used too..
I guessed i was just one of dos gurls..
Didnt stand a chance to let him love me..
i was harsh to him but he deserved tat..
I miss dos tyms..
i'd rather tat tings go back to how it was before i went out..
i loved it and enjoyed it..
Still rememba those days..
First date..
Firewerks..
HHmmm..
Forget it..
Wats past is past..
No point ponderin over it..
But i jz cant help it..
I seriously like him..
Despite wat he did to me..
And wat he led things to be..
i still want him tho..
wells...
After lunch went for werk..
Boring..
Tomorrow off day..
Time fo maself..
go sauna..
Yeah2!!
eat jessie darling's cooking..
Pasta..
Yum Yum..
:P
finished werk at 5.45pm..
stupid computer had problem shutting down..
earlier on, wen i was on ma wy to da staircase to smoke at werkplace, i bump..
into a cute malay guy..
aaahhh..
he smiled at me and i smiled back..
i didnt realise dat i actually blushed..
hehe..
met Tania at werkplace..
then went to tampines starbucks..
then we went shopping to find gifts for her anniversary..
never mind..
i shall celebrate anniversary one day after such a long tym..
cant wait to go out triple date..
tania and her baby..
jessie and her darling..
me and ???..
haha..
soon..
not ready yet fo now.
still trying to heal from a broken heart...
i reached home at 8.55pm..
had an emotional breakdown fo a while..
i was thinking of ma baby when suddenly ma womb..
it was so farking painful that i cried..
ate ma medicine but it doesnt help..
then opened ma wallet to take sumting and by accident saw his pic..
and ma heart broke again...
haiz..
up till now ma womb is still painful..
but theres nothing i can do..
i guess baby's just angry with me..
Him: thanks fo not bein around when i needed u da most.
thanks fo letting me suffer all da pain and the problems alone.
thanks fo hurting me deep tat it left a deep scar..
thanks fo letting me lyk u and then disappear jz lyk dat..
thanks fo making me believe that u're da person that i want
thanks fo saying to me all those honey coated words makin me believe that u will keep ur words..
thanks fo kissing me and making me ask for more..
thanks fo making me love u and to realise that i am such a fool.
but still.. i will keep on loving him..
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Sunday, November 05, 2006
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Ma mom switched off the fan..
Woke up...
Bath..
Had breakfast..
Stayed at home all the wae till 4pm..
Left for bugis..
Meeting tania and jessie and rachel at 5.30 to revise fo maths..
Went to National Library to borrow books fo ma beloved sister..
then met jessie and ate ma supposedly lunch at Bugis food junction..
Quite expensive for a prata so i bought sambal fried rice instead..
Dis is da first tym i ate a whole bowl of rice..
ANdi so dont like to eat rice..
EEWW...
Then met tania at Macdonalds..
talked and smoked..
Didnt study...
Haha..
Then i left at 7.30pm to go fetch ma sis at her werkplace...
Reached at 8pm and suprisingly her fren send us back home by car..
Played computer..
Tried a million tyms to install da bloody creative micro thingy on ma computer but failed..
gave up and off da comp..
Watch Mtv until 2 am and decided to sleep or else i wont have enuff rest..
Got maths paper and werk tomorrow..
I miss ma baby..
I wish i could have him by ma side...
Tania: crazy piglet u.. i love u tho..
Jessie: be strong dear.. let tym decide fo u.. we are weak but we have to overcome it..
Baby: i'm sorry.. i shouldnt have given up on u... I love u more than i love anyone else.. even ur "dad"..
Dont hate me or blame me okay.. i wanted to give u a gd lyf but i failed.. Love me and forgive me okay?.. I love you...
Him: I always tout dat u r a nice guy.. Little did i expect to receive dis from u.. Thanks fo letting me fall, tying me down and leaving jz lyk dat wit all da problems and heartbreaks... U will one dae realise dat da one that u've been searchin fo has always been ryte infront of u.. I love u.
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Saturday, November 04, 2006
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Hehe..
Then played computer fo a while..
Ate breakfast..
Ate medicine..
Then went out at around 5 to meet ma sister's colleague at her werkplace..
Her fren send us to Ang Mo Kio fo some gathering plus eating stuff..
Left da house at 7plus..
Took MRT back to Bedok to take out money from Maybank..
Then took bus home..
Fried some stuff to eat with porridge..
Then watched Dvd..
Felt so tired that i fell asleep..
Man.. What a boring lyf.. Haha...
Meeting Tania and Jessie tmrw fo maths revision..
I still want ma baby..
HHmm.. :(
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Friday, November 03, 2006
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Had Geography paper 2 today..
Jessie was late again..
I went up first..
Infact was early..
Then paper's kinda tough..
I didnt studied much..
Hopefully i wont fail it..
After paper, mom was already downstairs..
Before that Ms Clara talked to me..
She's so caring..
SO touched..
Haiz..
Wat a nice mentor, teacher...
Then ate lunch with ma mom and Jessie at coffee express..
Then went to Bugis to buy charger fo ma motorola razor then buy towel..
No idea fo wat..
Then took a cab to Mount Elizabeth's Hospital..
Met Tania and Ms Clara there..
So touching that they were willing to be der..
So touched..
At around 3plus..
Went for da scan..
My baby..
So cute..
So small...
Didnt have da heart...
God..
A few minutes after tat..
Baby's gone..
I'm gonna truly badly miss it..
Man..
I'm gonna live a life full of regrets..
Baby..
I'm sorry..
I didnt have a choice..
I was forced too..
Your father is such a ****..
Haiz..
He didnt even show any concern..
Forget it..
Baby..
I love you...
I'm gonna miss you..
Please forgive me..
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Thursday, November 02, 2006
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Haiz..
Had to wake up at 7.30am again..
Had paper again..
This tym round i have english paper 1 & 2..
And physics paper 2..
Ma english composition was lyk fark..
Had no idea to write..
Infact i was rather kinda too emotional..
You see da topic is - an incident where i'm forced to do something i dislike..
I wrote about da baby..
Haiz..
As for da other part, had to write newspaper article..
To promote school..
I wrote anyhow only..
Haiz..
Paper 2 starts at 11.45am and i tout its 12.30pm..
So because of me, both Tania and Jessie were late for 45mins..
I felt damn guilty..
Lucky i managed to finish on tym and i even wrote neatly..
Physics paper was kind of alryte..
I memorised 12 formulas out of 18..
After paper, went to Bugis take neoprint wit both my loves - Tania and Jessie
Then head to banquet to meet my officer..
Then continued to slack there with my loves and Jessie's boifren...
Then went to Long John to eat..
After eating, i kept vomitting..
Then after tat go take mrt to ma sis werk'splace..
Tania followed..
Then fetch ma sister and we left to proceed home..
Seperated wit Tania at bedok interchange...
Bath and then fell aslepp while watchin dead or alive..
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Wednesday, November 01, 2006
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I LOVE YOU!!
MAY ALL UR WISHES CUM TRUE!!!
Haiz..
Woke up early again..
Got chemistry paper..
Didnt study at all...
Paper was kinda tough..
Ms Selena gave me hints though..
So thoughtful of her..
So nice..
After paper, rushed off to werk..
So sad..
Today is Tania's bdae!!
But i cant spend tym wit her..
I'm such a useless friend..
Reached werk at 11.30am..
System's down so my supervisor asked me to go for early lunch..
Went fo lunch wit ma colleagues - Yus and Fazilah..
Ate at da temporary market..
I mean the market kinda coffeshop..
Then at around 2pm, system is back to normal..
Was supposed to overtym bt already made appointment to go out wit ma sis..
At 5.45pm, i signed da in and out book and left.
Met ma sis at paya lebar mrt..
Then head to Chinatown..
Bought 3 watches and walked all the way to Boat Quay..
Ate coffebeans..
It rained and we had to take a cab home..
Went back home..
Played x-box and fell asleep..
Tania: Darling, i'm sorry.. I didnt spend ur bdae wit u..
Treat u eat Marina South when i get ma pay okay?..
LOVE YOU...
